off da hook

I was on the phone last night and we'd been talking for a bit, and I thought I detected the "wrap-up" voice. Since I am so compassionate, and even though I had a lot more deep comments and philosophical insights to make, I was like, "Ok, well goodnight," but then he said, "What?" FALSE ATTRIBUTION.

You know when you're talking to someone and it's like time to wind that shit down and you say something that starts with "well." "Well...." is a major indicator of "okay GOODBYE we have been talking way too long and I have nothing left to say." If you hear "well," make up something really fucking cool and awesome that demands your immediate attention. Then hang up first.

Like I don't think the "two-ring phone pickup" is legit anymore because I fucking know you waited for the second ring before you answered. If you're really cool, then you'll wait much longer because you are super duper busy and have no time for phone calls. Like if you're living at home and blog during the day, you probably don't even have time to answer. (Which is obviously hard because your phone is ringing off the hook).