Conviction by numbers

Over the weekend I ran a half-marathon in Boston. There is nothing which makes you feel more "just like an number" than actually being a fucking number and starting a race surrounded by thousands of people, who will then proceed to fart, spit, and dump their water on you. And, since I don't listen to music when I run, I heard everything. The guy running and farting who thought no one could hear him? Yup, I did. I knew it was him. And I looked at him so he knew I knew, but I don't think he was even aware it was happening. Runners are the worst.

The most important part of the race is OBVIOUSLY the gear. So first there's like what you are actually going to wear to the race. I don't even mean what's comfortable, I mean how are you going to signal to other runners that you know what's up with the race: you shop at Super Runners and not Nike because you aren't fucking around. Athletic apparel with a number(s) on it, which do not actually reference your specific number from a previous athletic event but is going for more of a trendy feel, won't cut it. For example, Old Navy shorts with "27 American Football" does not count.

And then there's the actual event gear. Beyond important. This is key because it will signal to people/ future competitors that you race. You don't run "for fun," you run because winning is fun. (The fact that you are not from Kenya will inevitably work against this and should prompt you to buy gear from races you don't run ---just for conviction by numbers).